I don’t really know how I feel about celebrating New Years except that it seems like a good time to reflect on the previous 12 months and to imagine the possibilities to come in the next 12. I have a lot in the works right now - my online and irl Poisonous Plant Medicine courses are starting soon, I’m planning to relaunch my online shop with new medicines and crystals this month, I hope to finish my second book whose name I got my Instagram handle from, and I want to launch more online courses in the coming months...
On a personal level I’m working on processing some deep trauma I unconsciously thought I could avoid and stepping more firmly into the role of adult and teacher in the world. Last night I pulled the 6 of pentacles as my card for 2019, so I’m sitting with the possibilities there. My card for 2018 was The Empress and that was certainly a major theme over these last 12 months. Every year I think to myself, wow that was the most transformative year of my life, I bet things will settle down now. Lol. It never does. And I’m realizing I don’t really want it to. I don’t think there’s an end point to inner work and a big part of my work now seems to be accepting that more fully.
Things do get easier though. I become more myself, more mature, wiser, more relaxed, and more content with each passing year. I feel grateful for the Kathryns of years past that did their work so that I can be the Kathryn who is here now. I often wonder what I will reminisce on when I am at the end of my life and I think it will be facing my shadow, facing my Underworld, and doing the painful work just as much or more as it will be the good times and the laughter and the peaks.